O, Our Father in Heaven, why is it that I don’t think of You more?
O, Our Father in Heaven, why is it that I don’t think of You more? As I reflect, I see how You have given me everything I need in order to know and to do Your will, to know and love You, and to come to You at my passing from this life.
When I think of it, it seems so simple to be pleasing to You! If I think of You often, which is not that difficult, it is pleasing to You. If I confess my sins often, go to Mass on Sunday, and as often as I can on other days, it is pleasing to You. If I pray every day, even for just fifteen minutes, and pray the Rosary as often as I can, it is pleasing to You. As I reflect, it really is quite simple and straightforward.
Yet, I don’t do these things, at least not all of them. Why? I don’t even know the answer. If it is so simple, as I see it to be, why do I fail in this effort? What else do I do with my time? I just get so distracted by other concerns. Life is busy, but You know this. Still, is it that difficult for me to do these simple things, to take these simple steps to be pleasing to You, and to know and love You?
You ask me for an undivided heart. I know. I have heard and read this countless times. I know, but I find it so difficult to focus on You as much as I really desire to. But, does that count? My desire for You? Is my desire for You pleasing to You? But it does not actually become quality time with You if I only let it stay a mere desire.
What, then? Maybe my “busy life” is half busy by my own design, flawed creature that I am. I guess the part of my faith that is most difficult is…staying focused. You have provided all that I need, and more, to become holy and to be Your faithful child. This, I know, is the only thing that will truly make me happy. But…focus, focus. I need to see how I can adjust my focus.
But, I am not a priest, or monk, or nun. I am in this world, with all of its distractions. How do I have an undivided heart when I, basically, have a divided heart! How do I find You while remaining “in this world but not of this world.” Maybe that’s what I should focus on for Advent. Your Son entered this world, but was not “of this world.” He was “in this world” just like I am “in this world,” but He stayed in communion with You. Help me see how I can do the same. Help me focus on what matters the most. Show me how to carve out time in my busy life to pray daily, go to Mass more often, make time for a regular Confession, and simply think of You more freely and easily.
O, Father in Heaven, please let my Advent be a time where I can remove all the obstacles that get in the way of being with You more completely. Help me to be devoted to You with an undivided heart.
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